Page 54 - Talented Astrologer • Volume 1 Number 1 • September 2016
P. 54

When you tell the story, you won’t feel love and appreciation because everyone in the o ce celebrated your birthday;
you’ll feel anger and resentment because it was the wrong kind of cake.
But if you question the expectation, and recognize the truth that it was unfounded, the resentmentdisappears.
Your unconscious expectations fall into four major categories.
Everyone has unconscious expectations of convenience, agreement, compliance, and approval. Collectively, these are caca expectations.  ese expectations are responsible for the lion’s share of the anger and resentment you experience. Let’s consider each one individually.
What are expectations of convenience?
Everyone enjoys instant grati cation.  e ego has the impulse control of a sugar-fueled two-year-old. We want what we want when we want it, and we expect to get it now. Delay or denial is frustrating because it
violates our unconscious expectations of convenience. Expectations of convenience can also be triggered when someone or something interrupts us, or when we have to do something we don’t especially want to do at the
What are expectations of
When we express an idea, opinion, or point of view, we expect that other people will
agree with it.  is is why it can be so jarring when someone disagrees with us or
has a di erent perspective.  at’s now how the world
is supposed to work.
But expectations of agreement also work in the opposite direction and create the unconscious expectation that we should agree with other people. When someone else expresses a preference
we don’t share, it triggers this expectation.
When you become aware of your expectations of agreement and release them, it creates a space for discussion, collaboration, and healthy debate. And it
becomes acceptable to agree to disagree.
What are expectations of compliance?
Expectations of compliance have multiple layers. On one level, compliance means we expect other people to do what we want them to do. As with agreement, we may also have an expectation that we must comply with other people’s wishes.  is is a signi cant source of resentment. Unconscious expectations of compliance create the perception that we don’t have a choice in the matter and that we’re obligated to do something that we do not want — or choose — to do.
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